For this Luddite, the Consumer Electronics Show (CES) 2017 this week provided an electronic view into the future. One, frankly, I’d rather not see.

New gadgets have arrived that connect us to The Internet of Things and promise to improve our lives is so many ways.

Parenting has never been easy. Alexa may be a perfect companion with her range of knowledge, music and jokes. She can even replace parents who may be clueless about homework.

Speaking of unaware or absent parents, today you can fire the nanny and leave the kids in the trustful mechanical hands of the AvatarMind iPal robot.

Now you can leave home and not worry about the pets either. The Catspad dishes out just the right amount of food and water for your feline friend. Heck, just let the kids eat there, too.

This seems a little spacey to me, but the Mars Levitating Bluetooth Hi-Fi Speaker that promises higher audio quality looks like a cross between a miniature flying saucer and chunky Frisbee. Good for tossing music across the room or backyard with your siblings and friends.

I admit it. I should help my wife more in the kitchen. But perhaps my assistance would be better in the form of an electronic sidekick like Hello Egg.

With so many electronics interconnected, some may worry about the impact of electromagnetic waves and environmental hazards on our minds and bodies.

Not to worry. We are—how should I phrase this–well protected with anti-radiation underwear and anti-pollution headwear.

And we can rest our feet in the Digitsole to keep toes cozy on winter nights or track calories during the day. I’ll just stick with my heating pad thank you very much.

Yes, physical comfort is important but so is personal appearance. Our beautiful wives and lovely children certainly will appreciate the Kerastase Hair Coach. That’s right.  It’s a smart brush and good companion for the equally intelligent Kolibree Ara Toothbrush.

With all things electronic at home I’m afraid to step inside my house. Maybe I should just pack it all in and hit the road.

If I do, thankfully, lost luggage will never be a problem again. Thanks to Bibelib we can “travel with serenity.”   But my carry on bag works just fine for me.

I concede it’s too much for me. With so many electronics, smart devices and apps, I opt to stay permanently behind the electronic curve where I’m happy and in control.

Although I see my smart, beautiful wife is getting ready to fix dinner. Wait, is that the Catspad?